The Dinner Table - May, 2005
What ever happen to the dinner table? It used to be a time when we waited for dad to come home
and dinner was set. There was discussion of the day. How was Mom's day? How was school today?
Did grandma call? Today, that is gone. The dinner table is now a decorated piece in the house
where families display their best dishes for friends who drop by.
Many people blame the economy for the demise of the dinner table. Mom has now gone to work,
Dad, when he get off, goes to the bar to have a Brusque with his friends. Little Josh comes home
and heads for his Game Boy, and little Susie gets on the phone and talks to all her friends whom
she left at school an hour ago.
When Mom gets home, she is too tired to cook, so she calls Dad on the cell phone and tells him
to pick up something. He then arrives with separate bags of McDonalds and hands then to their
respective parties who again retreat to their rooms. The night fades into the morning and it is
the same all over again.
The dinner table used to be a place of conversation. Life was discussed and the problems of the
family were thrashed out. By talking, you knew what your children did and even what was going
on at the office.
The lack of the dinner table communication today, is in my belief, the cause of many social
problems. Our children are getting in to all sorts of trouble and it's never known until the police
comes knocking at the door. Daughters, at 13, are having sex right under their parents' noses,
and sons have more condoms in their rooms than Walgreens.
The church too is now guilty of not promoting this old tradition. Now that Mom and Dad are at
work, their financial contributions to the church are much more so. Sometimes the church's
position is selfish. Why rock the boat and lose the donations to their coffers? There was a time
to, when families went to church together. Now only Mom attends when she can and maybe
brings the kids with her while Dad goes of to the tailgate party before the game.
In this time of ever increasing lawlessness in our society, it is time to bring back the dinner
table. Personally, I remember a time when on Friday nights we dressed for dinner. We were not
going out, but we would put on our best and head down the hall for dinner. We talked about
everything. Afterwards, we'd put on aprons and wash the dishes. We, by this hour knew
everything about each other.
Today, when we hear the phrase, "My baby did not do that.", or as one mother put it to me when
I told her about her son's shortcomings, "I beg to differ." How does she know what he is doing
when she freely admits that she cannot remember the last time she and her son had dinner
together at home?
Even Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays are ruined by this lack of togetherness. Families
come by for a meal and everyone grabs a plate and goes into separate corners. The dinner table
is a place to come back to again. There, you will find the unity of the family and no doubt what is
going on in the family's life. It is time to take the decorated place setting off the table, sit with
your family while enjoying a plate of ribs, and talk to each other. You will find that more can be
said and done, instead of seeing some therapist, whose only interest is their hourly fee.
I long to see the dinner table again.